Archives for category: asian american

Everything In Its Time And Place

July 31, 2007 //

Preaching that we should always trust in God can feel kind of trite and condescending when done from the comfort of a sleepy Southern California suburb while yet another South Korean hostage has been murdered in Afghanistan. It’s bad enough that such a terrible series of events is happening, but I start to despair when the response of the body of Christ here is either deafening silence or outright hostility. One outstanding voice has been Eugene Cho, through his regular updates and insights into this situation.

There is a time and place for critiquing and questioning this group’s purpose and methodology in their trip to Afghanistan, but now is not that time. When people are being murdered and held hostage, we should mourn, weep and pray — not stand on our comfortable soapboxes, point fingers and blame the victims. It saddens me that a powerful voice such as Christianity Today barely mentions this tragedy — and, even then, focuses their coverage on critiquing Korean missionary efforts rather than sounding the call to prayer and solidarity.

Regardless of whether or not this particular group was there to overtly share their Christian faith, it frustrates me to hear criticisms such as, “Well, they should have known something like this would happen in such a dangerous place” or “They have no right to try to be there.” Maybe one day I will share some of my thoughts about the shortcomings of Korean and Korean American missionary efforts, but I will say this right now — I have known many Korean missionaries who have given up very comfortable lives in order to go live in hard places, often without electricity or running water and usually without recognition or applause, simply because they are compelled by the love of God in Christ. By the same line of reasoning many critics are following, the martyrs of Hebrews 11 should never have gone into difficult places hostile to Christ.

Lord, have mercy; Christ, have mercy.

Categories asian american, church, controversy, evangelism, frustration, outreach

That’s Some Plan B

July 13, 2007 //

My wife and I were meeting up with one of our college students the other day. We’re just getting to know all of them, and it has been next-to impossible to get them all together at once. So, we’ve been meeting them individually. Much of what this student shared from her life reflects the experience of many Asian American college students — she had roommate problems her first year, she’s looking for an internship, her family life is, unfortunately, quite broken.

But one thing she shared stood out to me. In the midst of sharing about her family, she mentioned that her older brother was thinking of going to seminary. Oh really? we asked. Yes, she replied. He hasn’t had much luck finding a job with his current degree (I think it was environmental science), so he thought he might have better luck with seminary.

Ugh.

It’s so easy to misinterpret or misunderstand the call to vocational church ministry. At one extreme, we over-spiritualize “the call.” Some people love the seat of power, and they think becoming a pastor will give them some kind of authority over people. Jesus had a couple of choice words for these folks. My wife and I used to work with a pastoral intern who loved sitting right next to the senior pastor at church functions, and who hid out in his office area on the church-wide cleanup day. I don’t like the fact that I just spent the last hour and a half cleaning the bathrooms and mopping the hallways here at church but, hey, it’s part of the deal in this case. Not because I’m particularly humble or holy — just realistic. We’re a very small church, and if I don’t do it, no one will. And, in my OCDness, I cannot stand for it.

I am a huge believer in the priesthood of all believers. Although being a church pastor is a unique position, I don’t believe it is inherently more holy or spiritual than working in an office or waiting on tables (in fact, it has a lot more in common with these vocations than some might think). We are all called to ministry — but our specific vocation will vary from person to person.

At the other extreme, some people look down on pastors — as if we ended up where we are today because nothing else worked out. Just today, I was having lunch with a church family when one of them asked me if I had been to college. I was genuinely taken aback. I am a graduate of the top-ranked undergraduate business school for over ten years running (not to mention the same university as John Legend).

Youth ministry is more than glorified babysitting; I work hard to provide spiritual care, formation and direction for our students. I invest in their lives. I keep up with the latest professional journals. I am constantly trying to innovate, edit, repent and be creative, honest, and genuine in my ministry. I have a Masters degree from a rigorous theological seminary program; as such, I try to engage students and their families from a theological, and developmental, perspective.

This is probably a little bit presumptuous on my part, but being in ministry is a little bit like being an artist. How many people have walked up to a Jackson Pollack and said, “My four-year old kid could do that.” Heck, even Olivia tried it out home once. In a similar way, I cannot tell you how many people have come up to me and basically said, “I could do that.” My brother-in-law constantly tinkers with the idea of going to seminary (although he is already a medical doctor) because he is a good public speaker and likes the idea of getting up there to preach. In both art and ministry, it is a lot harder than it looks. In fact, the best preachers I have known make it look easy because of the preparation they have put into it. Not to mention the fact that preaching is actually a very small part of what “ministry” actually is.

If this has all put you into a bad mood, I apologize. Watch this. You’ll feel better.

Categories asian american, boo!, church, ministry, sigh, youth ministry

They’re Coming to America

July 10, 2007 //

While we don’t want to overschedule our daughter, we have signed her up for a couple of fun activities this summer. She will be a part of our church’s VBS, of course, and a really cool day camp at SeaWorld later this summer — but today marked the beginning of this fun season. My wife and I tried to play it cool as we dropped her off this morning for the start of her two-week day camp (it’s still harder on us than it is for our daughter).

We like to interact with our daughter’s teachers. As people who have been involved in youth & children’s ministries for awhile now, we value the participation and input of parents. When we returned to pick up our daughter, the main teacher (out of three) greeted us with a big smile and said that our daughter had done really well. I was relieved to hear this; some of the older kids in the Pre/K group at church are pretty mean, and it has kind of given our daughter a complex about making friends. She is still a very friendly & outgoing kid, but this stress about not being able to make friends surfaces from time to time — resulting in huge heartache & frustration for us. A quick aside: if you find time to pray for us, this is the one thing that is constantly on my mind. My sincere thanks.

My relief was short-lived, though, as the teacher completed her thought. It went something like this: Your daughter did really well… I mean, her English is pretty good. It took me a second to realize what she had said. We explained that English is actually our daughter’s first language, because she was born here. The second teacher followed this up with, “Where are you from?” With wide-eyed disbelief, my wife responded, “Well, we’ve lived here in the States our whole lives, but our parents are from Korea.” The main teacher tried to brush it off with, “Oh, I could tell you were pretty Americanized, since your daughter brought pizza for lunch. Some kids bring those Hello Kitty lunchboxes with sushi, you know.”

A couple of caveats: I realize that they probably meant no harm. I’m sure they’re nice and all; just a little bit ignorant. I also realize that they probably don’t deal with many non-white people. This neck of the woods can be a little bit like that. I also understand that this is the world in which my daughter will be living for the rest of her life — I can’t shield her from ignorance forever.

Nonetheless, I am still extremely frustrated. This line of questioning — “Where are you from?” — reinforces the idea that of course we’re not from here. I mean, how could these Asian-looking faces be American, like the rest of us? Now, don’t get me wrong — I don’t want my daughter to assimilate, to feel like she has to run from her Asian-ness or push it aside for the sake of fitting in. Later, if one of her well-meaning white friends says to her, “I don’t even think of you as being Asian,” I don’t want her to take it as a compliment. I want her to be very confident in who God made her to be. While alienation and self-hatred has been the unfortunate story for many Asian American youth, I don’t believe that it must be part of the equation — and I am hoping & praying that my daughter can be spared as much of this heartache as possible. So, when her teacher asks her, “Where are you from?” and thinks it is really funny when she responds, “San Diego,” perhaps you can see why that would bother me.

On a personal level, I am really praying that I would have a thicker skin about things. Sometimes, the intensity of my emotional reaction to these kinds of situations precludes any kind of reasonable, constructive, or appropriate response. I don’t want to live with some kind of chip on my shoulder — I don’t want to give ignorant people that kind of control over my life. And, in all honesty, I think I have been better able to handle these kinds of things — at least when they deal directly with me.

For example, I am usually pretty patient with older Caucasian people who ask, “Where are you from?” just because they come from another world (these teachers from today, however, are not old at all — thus compounding my frustration). I can very politely tell these people that I think I know what they’re asking, but that it is actually pretty rude to ask in that manner (and, if they ask why it is rude, I will explain the whole alienation deal to them). I’m not sure why our racial ethnic background matters so much to some Caucasian people — I don’t often hear them asking each other, Are you German? Irish? Dutch? If one must know, then it is marginally better to ask, “Where are your parents from?” although this still carries much of the same outsider-connotation with it. Probably, it’s best simply to ask the question directly: What is your ethnic background or heritage?

However, when it comes to my daughter, my father-bear instincts kick in big time. I held back today because I don’t want to bias these teachers against my daughter just because they might perceive me as being some uppity Asian person.

Despite protests to the contrary, ignorant and racist attitudes persist today as systemic and institutional issues.

Remember the Skit Guys controversy from a little while back? I don’t mean to dredge up the past — certainly, the response of Youth Specialties, Marko, and the Skit Guys themselves showed that something good could come out of a bad situation. But, judging from the response of many people both at Marko’s and the Skit Guys’ blogs, we still have a long, long way to go. Some highlights:

Part of humor is laughing at ourselves. I hope we don’t become so sensitive that you guys can’t even minister. You guys characterize pastors, janitors, deacons, blondes, Christians, girls, boys…and all of those on purpose. And I love it! Is an Asian character not supposed to speak with an Asian dialect? I have not read the skit, but…at this rate you’ll be writing more apologies than skits.

Well, I have read the original skit and, though it might be pointless to try to help this person understand the underlying issues here, there is a world of difference between poking fun at a Caucasian pastor/janitor/blonde, etc. and laughing at the Engrish-speaking “oriental” buffoon, who clearly is not from here and does not, and could never, belong.

Or how about this little gem:

I pray that you don’t let this discourage you because in today’s society everyone is offended about something. God has truly blessed you two with the gift of ministry through comedy. I have seen you 3 times at the International Church of God Youth Conventions and you were awesome. Just remember that satan will use anything or anyone he can to try to keep us from glorifying God and spreading his Word. Just keep doing what you are doing….showing the love, mercy and grace of our Lord, Jesus Christ through the gift of christian comedy that he has given you!!!

Right, right… now I see — It’s the fault of uppity people of color that they are offended by blatant, degrading racial stereotyping. And speaking out for justice is obviously satanic. Our God (the same One who said, “Let justice roll on like a river, righteousness like a never-failing stream” and commanded His people, “You shall not oppress a stranger, since you yourselves know the feelings of a stranger, for you also were strangers in the land of Egypt”) would clearly not approve of this.

I’m really hoping this works out.

Categories asian american, community, family, frustration, race, second-generation, sigh

Weekend Approval Matrix 2.0

June 29, 2007 //

Here are some of my favorite (and not-so favorite) things from the past couple of weeks. Below, find some of my ranting and raving — starting at the top right and going clockwise around the matrix…

Party like it’s 1984. Given the recent close-but-no-cigar seasons of both the Red Wings and Pistons, I am somewhat reluctant to put my trust in Detroit sports. But Justin Verlander’s recent no-no, for the Tigers’ first no-hitter since the magical 1984 season, might make a believer out of me yet. Now, if the Lions would just get rid of their GM…

Mop top hair shop. My wife recently began pastoring our church’s Pre/K ministry. As part of their age-appropriate learning, she sets up interactive learning stations each Sunday that relate to the day’s theme. A couple of weeks ago, because the lesson focused on Samson we searched high and low for a Play-Doh mop top hair shop — but to no avail. Of course, we found one at Target the week after this lesson. Oh, and it’s called the Fuzzy Pumper Crazy Cuts Playset.

Does 50% constitute a reunion? While the recent album from Dinosaur Jr. should probably be filed under, “Don’t call it a comeback,” I wonder what to do with the upcoming Smashing Pumpkins album. Gish and Siamese Dream pumped some glammy, arena-rock energy into the 90’s indie rock scene, but what I liked best about them was that their band members included James Iha, an Asian American guitarist, and D’arcy Wretzky, a female bassist. However, for their upcoming “reunion” tour & album, neither of these core members will be participating. Boo!

Give me a break. Apparently, the American media is still determined to portray Asian American men as either geeky, asexual nerds or kung-fu fighting foreigners who no speakie-Engrish, as Yul Kwon points out in this video [h/t: David Park]. Double boo!

Categories asian american, boo!, hooray!, just grinning, race, sigh

“I Have Some Real Good Black Friends”

June 22, 2007 //

I am deeply saddened, frustrated and outraged at the very idea that these kinds of things still happen in our day and age. I came across this story via Edward Gilbreath’s blog about a church in South Carolina where white members of the church performed in blackface — in blackface — for a Mother’s Day presentation.

Is it really necessary to explain to people why this kind of egregious conduct is so offensive? While it is vital that we educate people on the damaging effects of systemic racism, the fact remains that blatant, overt, hostile racism still exists. This story only spirals further and further downward as we begin to delve deeper into it.

This kind of behavior is unacceptable in any forum, but the fact that these people consider themselves Christians and presented this in church is absolutely dumbfounding. Seriously, what could such a horrible, offensive performance possibly have to do with Mother’s Day? Worse, the pastor of the church tried to pass it off as some kind of tribute to African American people and gospel music. Right, because our natural response to those we admire is to denigrate and dehumanize them. Worse still, the defensiveness, hostility and sarcasm of the pastor’s wife reveals the depth of their ignorance. In her own words,

“A little tiny blonde woman sang Randy Travis. So I guess Randy Travis should be offended,” Teresa Holbrooks said. “My husband pantomimed playing the piano. So I guess the piano should be offended.”

It is difficult for me even to gather a response to such overwhelming ignorance, but let’s go ahead and state what should be obvious to any human being — particularly someone who claims allegiance to Christ. I suppose if Randy Travis had been enslaved, attacked, degraded and oppressed by little blonde women for hundreds of years then, yes, he should be offended by such a performance. And pianos, if they were human beings created in the image of God, intimately known and loved, for whom Christ died then, sure, they should be offended as well.

Even worse than all of this was their “apology.” From their pastor:

Holbrooks gave a two-sentence statement: “Pilgrim Baptist Church and I meant no harm in the blackface skit. However there are those who have been offended and for that I am sorry.”

Anyone who has ever been in a relationship with another human being should realize that a conditional apology is not, in reality, a genuine apology. I don’t mean to parse out these sentences too much, but there is a serious problem with this pastor’s words — apparently, he is not sorry that they performed this routine; he is only sorry that they offended people. Or, to put it more cynically, he is only sorry they were caught red-handed.

Ed Gilbreath mentions a very troubling idea in his initial post on this topic that is well worth considering:

I can only speak anecdotally on this, but there seems to be a growing movement of white people—including Christians—who feel so victimized by political correctness (and how it’s robbing them of their rights) that they’ve hardened their hearts to any suggestion that racial injustice is a factor in our society today. And they’ve become cold to how their privileged words and actions might affect others. That defensive mindset and callousness could be the biggest obstacles to true reconciliation in our churches and nation.

It is deeply troubling that many white people seem to consider it their God-given right to use inflammatory, degrading, racist language and then become enraged when someone else calls them out on this. Certainly, there are racial prejudices and sinful attitudes among any and all racial/ethnic groups, but this attitude is uniquely troubling to me in white people. There is a kind of willful ignorance to the past, a bewildering sense of entitlement. People of other racial/ethnic backgrounds are told to “lighten up” because “it’s only a joke” and “I have some real good black friends.”

I know political correctness has almost exclusively negative connotations, and has failed in many ways. I experienced this during my first year in college during our university’s infamous “water buffalo” incident.

I am not advocating PC, but is it really such a terrible thing to have people engage one another in civil, polite discourse? Shouldn’t it be second nature, common sense, for God’s people to treat others with dignity and respect? I refuse to give into the shrill talking heads and shrieking pundits who equate “being real” with rudeness. I am fully aware that altering a person’s vocabulary does almost nothing to change their hearts — genuine transformation can only happen through the guidance and leadership of the Holy Spirit — but, again, would it really kill people that much to treat others with respect? In particular, followers of Christ who claim to believe what the Bible says cannot simply edit out the parts where God creates all people in His own image, replete with dignity, worth and honor.

And our words do matter. Jesus Himself said it this way in Luke 6:45, “Good people bring good things out of the good stored up in their heart, and evil people bring evil things out of the evil stored up in their heart. For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.” Hateful, racist words do not pop up out of nowhere, and they certainly do not flow from a pure, genuine heart for God.

Is there hope for our nation, for the body of Christ? Talking to people who willfully dwell in such ignorance is like beating your head against a wall. And yet, somehow, we are called to be messengers of reconciliation — with God and with one another. Although it is a small step for me personally, I am raising my voice as an Asian American follower of Christ to name this racist offense against the African American community as sin. May God have mercy on us.

Categories asian american, boo!, church, controversy, race, reconciliation