Was it the preseason hype over the big trades? Is it the curse of 1984? Is it because our bullpen ace keeps injuring himself in freak accidents, over & over?

Oh, Tigers. I’m greatly relived that you finally won your first game. But would it be possible to get some middle relief? You’d think the successive years of World Series futility the Yankees have experienced (a Murderers’ Row-esque lineup, but spotty pitching at best) would have given management some guidance. At least our prospects are better than the Rockies?

Well, I’m going to stick with you, my feline friends. I think all those years of being a Lions fan have taught me (along with that near record setting stinkbomb you laid in 2003) the value of perseverance in my fanhood. Let’s go, Tigers!