Checking In At The Smackdown Hotel

December 20, 2007 //

Like the opening of the floodgates at your local big box retailer on Black Friday or the simultaneous release of film twins (Volcano + Dante’s Peak, Armageddon + Deep Impact, etc.), boisterous criticism from prominent Christians against other Christians seems to come in waves. As if according to some invisible timer, charges of being a universalist/false teacher/heretic/Lions fan are tossed around with great volume and passion on a somewhat predictable basis.

Like many of us, I am completely put off by the tone of these kinds of attacks. While many of these voices claim that they are simply “defending” the truth or “contending” for the Gospel, it usually just feels like name-calling and finger-pointing.

However, what really stands out to me is the exuberance with which the rank-and-file of these folks jump in, especially in the blogosphere. It’s strangely reminiscent of how rasslin’ crowds would eagerly finish Dwayne Johnson’s catchphrases. But instead of singing along with If you can smell-la-la-la… what the Rock is cooking! they finish accusations of Heretic! and Arrogant mocker! with a chorus of Thus saith the Lord (or was it ‘Cuz Stone Cold said so?).

While both of these approaches are remarkably effective at galvanizing a particular constituency, only one is the most electrifying.

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Here’s something we can all agree on: Rodney Mullen is rad!

Categories church, communication, community, controversy, emerging church, faith, sigh

How To Apologize Sincerely

December 18, 2007 //

Earlier this week, we were up in the LA ~~wasteland~~ area and I was reminded of how much I really, really dislike driving there (I’m trying to refrain from saying that I hate it because, as we’ve been teaching our daughter, that’s a very strong word — but, seriously, I was on the verge of losing it completely the whole time we were driving around). One thing I do miss, though, is Air Talk with Larry Mantle on KPCC, the local NPR station up there. Larry Mantle is a great interviewer but, like Cinderella shrilled, you don’t know what you got ’till it’s gone.

Here in SD, I have tried to supplant my morning Mantle with These Days on KPBS, hosted by Tom Fudge — with mixed results. I’m not saying anything bad about Fudge — I mean, the man bikes to work (and survived a scary accident after being hit by a car while biking to work one morning); I think I was just used to Larry Mantle’s banter and rhythm.

I did hear a really interesting topic recently on These Days: “Apologies: Do Them Meaningfully and Gracefully Accept Them.” Politicians are infamous for non-apologies. Think, Mistakes were made, “We” made mistakes or If I did anything wrong… One guest, Dr. Bruce Weinstein, points out that the classic non-apology, “I’m sorry if you were offended” is actually a thinly veiled criticism: “Well, it’s your fault for being so thin-skinned or weak in character anyways.”

Life together is so messy. In any kind of community (families, churches, friends, workplaces) we constantly run the risk of stepping on each other’s toes, whether consciously done or not. Jokes gone wrong, careless words, thoughtless actions: We hurt the people we love, we mess up all the time. While we don’t want to become a groveling heap, learning to apologize sincerely is crucial if we hope to create, build and sustain genuine community.

I appreciate John Ortberg’s idea on forgiveness from Everybody’s Normal Till You Get To Know Them: “Forgiveness begins when we give up the quest to get even.” This is an enormous sticking point for most people; accomplishing it would be nothing short of life-changing. As my wife recently heard from a speaker at her MOPS group, when we choose not to forgive someone else it’s like drinking poison and wishing that they would die. However, I find myself often content to forgive and forget… that you ever existed at all. But the story of the Gospel is one of reconciliation, not avoidance passed off as forgiveness. If we are to live as God’s people, we must learn to forgive and how to ask for forgiveness.

We live in a culture of non-apologies — it’s all damage control and spin. While that might play well to focus groups, it does little for actual relationships. Instead, may we choose the hard path of humility, sincerity and responsibility.

Categories church, communication, community, faith, family, health, ministry, reconciliation

Don’t Call It A Comeback! An Indie Trifecta

December 13, 2007 //

Although I have lamented the death of the indie record store, my hope has been restored by my recent discovery of M-Theory Records right here in San Diego. The store is not nearly as big as, say, Amoeba Records in Hollywood, but still keeps a great selection of indie rock on hand. While I often dread encountering the stereotypical snobby indie record store clerk, the staff at M-Theory is friendly, without being overbearing; definitely, no sense of being judged when you bring your music to the counter. Support independent music!

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We had to make a trip out to Los Angeles earlier this week to get some things ready for Christmas here at church, and I stopped by the aforementioned Amoeba. They also have a pretty nice staff; once, they gave my daughter a free Amoeba t-shirt. In fact, she recognized the store by said shirt during our recent visit. In their massive used section, I was able to find a copy of Dirty by Sonic Youth for less than five dollars. Makes flipping through their mountain of discs worthwhile!

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To complete this independent music troika, check out my friend’s interview with Sufjan Stevens from a few years back — right before Sufjan became the international indie heartthrob composer that he is today (watch part six of “The BQE” below). Joshua’s writing is what inspired me, in part, to try it out on my own.

Categories community, hooray!, indie, music

Not With This Car

December 6, 2007 //

Today, our car battery died. More specifically, it died on three separate occasions — all within the course of an hour. The first time it went down for the count was, fortunately (or so I thought), at a gas station. We had just filled up our tank and were preparing to leave when the car wouldn’t start. It was the middle of the afternoon and there were plenty of people around so, even though we didn’t have jumper cables, I thought we’d be recharged and ready to leave in no time. Apparently, I was wrong.

First, I approached the employees and asked if they had jumper cables. They informed me that they did not, which seemed strange to me, but I figured there were plenty of other people there so it wouldn’t be a problem. After being told by three or four people that, sorry, they didn’t have cables I ran across the way to the drug store to pick up a set of cables. Now that we have our own cables, I thought, things would be much easier. Wrong again.

I ran back and started asking people for help: Sorry to bother you, but we’re stranded here at the gas station. Our car is right over there and I have these cables in my hand. Could you give us a jump? About four or five people said no (and a couple of others got into their cars and left as quickly as they could when they saw me walking around the gas station) when I approached a man in a Mercedes. When I asked for help, instead of replying with a simple “no” he scoffed and said, “Not with this car.” It’s not just that the effort of popping the hood and turning the key to start the engine is just too much to ask; it’s the very thought of contaminating his luxury import with my unworthy family sedan. I don’t even have my Junky Car Club sticker on my car — I guess he just has extrasensory perception about these kinds of things.

Eventually, one of the employees came out and gave me a jump. We drove off, dumbfounded. I can be pretty cynical, but that man’s hardcore condescension took me off guard. However, my faith in our fellow human beings was restored by the next person who helped us. I’ve had car batteries die before and, usually, after getting jumped and being driven for awhile things work out alright. However, after running a few errands (and leaving the car running, with someone inside, of course) the car decided to call it a day once again in a parking lot while it was still running. That, I’ve never experienced.

Dreading a repeat of the gas station incident, I went straight to the employees. I was pleasantly surprised when one employee, Elizabeth, offered to help right away. Because of the way the parking spaces were configured, our jumper cables would not reach her car. I began pushing the car out and Elizabeth started helping me push as well. She then explained to another customer who was angry that the car was blocking her way that our car battery had died and we needed a jump, and could she pull out of the parking in lot in the other direction? Once the cars were properly positioned, jumping it was a breeze. We thanked Elizabeth sincerely (I’m definitely writing a letter to her manager to let them know how helpful she was to us) and were on our way.

What a mess we all are. Even when we have good intentions, sometimes just having a bad day throws everything out the window. I think, in some providential way, God knew that I needed to both the beauty and depravity residing in all of us, and to remind me to help others in need — even if it inconveniences me a bit.

Categories boo!, communication, faith, frustration, hope

Join The Club!

December 4, 2007 //

Maybe it’s because I’ve been fighting off a nasty cold for a couple of weeks (an airplane is just a petri dish with wings) or because we are extremely busy with church (what else is new?), but it just hasn’t been looking a lot like Christmas for me these days. It’s not any kind of cynical holiday-burnout; I’m just kind of beat.

I find myself becoming more & more liturgical — both in how I envision our community worshiping together and in my personal sense of what it means to seek after God. Not liturgy for its own sake, but as a way of creating a rhythm in seeking after God. The word liturgy itself can be translated as, “The work of the people.” Most days, spiritual awakening and passionate revival aren’t falling from the sky in the form of high-density protein bars (nope, not even this kind). For me, the experience of God happens in the active search, the longing, the seeking. I need to lean in, to calm down, to pay attention to God.

Advent (which began this past Sunday) is a season of watching and waiting, expectation and anticipation. I love that, for the Church, our calendar is not set by the madness of Black Friday. No, our year begins as we prepare the way of our Lord, as Christine Sine explains in this wonderful post about Advent. The Advent season reminds me that business is not as usual and that I am being called into a different rhythm.

I recently joined the Junky Car Club. From their site: “Junky Car Club members are learning to live with less so we can give more. We’re a bunch of happy drivers who are politely rebelling against consumerism by driving junky cars. We encourage our members to use their dough to support social justice causes instead of making fat car payments. We believe in environmental stewardship and hanging onto things a little longer. Junky Car Club members sponsor kids living in poverty through Compassion International.”

I love that phrase, learning to live with less so we can give more. It reminds me of a great GK Chesterton quote I read in Al Hsu’s The Suburban Christian:

There are two ways to get enough. One is to continue to accumulate more and more. The other is to desire less.

It’s easy to rant about Jesus being the “reason for the season” or to denounce the commercialization of Christmas. Learning to desire less stuff — that’s where life happens. The Junky Car Club is a fun way of promoting the transformation of hearts & minds and making a difference in the world. And, as an Asian American, I love the idea of subverting our car-obsessed culture. Seriously, how many Asian American youth pastors have had students hold down a part time job just to support their body-kit habit on their perpetual work-in-progress Honda Civic? Imagine what would happen if we, collectively, decided to ditch The Fast and the Furious for simple, authentic love, mercy and justice.

In a small way, joining the Junky Car Club has become part of my personal liturgy during this Advent season. Instead of a self-indulgent holiday filled with more and newer, just a little bit of self-control (because, really, simply owning a car at all — no matter how beat-down or busted — makes us rich in a global perspective) can point me towards the heart of Christ during Advent. Jesus came to serve, not to be served; and He calls us to the same. If I can live with just a little bit less, there will be that much more to give.

Christ has come; Christ is coming! Prepare the way of the Lord!

Categories asian american, church, community, design, environment, faith, stewardship