Archives for category: family

Yesterday, our family made a trip out to Walmart.

We don’t usually shop there, but my wife needed to pick up some supplies that we were pretty sure we could only get there.

While we were leaving the fabric section, an employee engaged me in a game of “cross-race blindness.” Our conversation went something like this:

Employee: Hey, Jackie Chan!

Me: (Blank stare)

Employee: Oh… didn’t I see you last week?  Remember when I told you that you looked just like Jackie Chan?

Me: No, that was someone else. I wasn’t here last week.

Employee: Oh… but you look just like Jackie Chan, too! Right?!

Me: No, I don’t. Not at all.

As we left the area, I could see the employee give another employee an astonished look, as if she couldn’t believe that I could not see my own striking resemblance to Jackie Chan.

Read the rest of this entry »

Race, Politics, Family

Back in October, we went to see Mo’olelo Performing Arts Company’s production of Yellow Face, by David Henry Hwang — the Tony-award winning playwright behind M. Butterfly.

I’m a bit of a cultural Philistine, so I don’t make any claims to understand much about theater, but I really enjoyed this performance. Yellow Face is a semi-autobiographical, postmodern take on race, identity, family and artistic integrity. You can read a bit more from Mo’olelo here.

I appreciated David Henry Hwang’s use of humor throughout the play, given the intensely personal nature of the ground he was covering. Discussions about race, politics, family, art, etc. can quickly become glum affairs. The quick pace of the dialogue, the multimedia backdrop (see a few photos here), and the interweaving of fact and fiction held my attention throughout.

Yellow Face raises many important questions: How much of our identity (our “face”) do we choose? How do we understand race and identity in our ever-changing culture? Do our parents’ dreams eventually become ours?

Read the rest of this entry »

This weekend, I was privileged to officiate my first wedding. While there was quite a bit of running around, it was a joy to watch two members of our community begin a new life together as a husband and wife in Christ.

In the chaotic run-up to the wedding, between setting up a projector in an outlet that, hopefully, wouldn’t catch fire, sound-checking the new system, locating lost candles and pins for the boutonnieres, a random church member stopped me for a quick conversation.

It went something like this:

Person: I know a friend of your family’s from back home.

Me: That’s great!

Person: I heard from them that you went to Wharton.

Me: Yes, that true.

Person: Well, my daughter graduated from there.

Me: That’s great!

Person: She graduated with a degree in finance. What was your major?

Me: Marketing.

Person: Oh, really? Then why don’t you have a job?

Me: My parents ask me that every time I talk to them.

Person: (Turns and walks away)

I suppose if I had a minute (or twenty), I would have spoken to her about the nature of vocation and calling, and that, while I don’t believe in the “professionalization” of ministry (i.e., let the paid professionals provide the religious goods & services to a passive consumer audience), I still believe being a pastor is a legitimate job. An awfully-paying job, but a legit job nonetheless.

I would have told her that it only becomes more difficult over time to realize what I sacrificed when I answered God’s call to go to seminary and enter vocational church ministry, and that – most of the time – I believe it is worth it, but I have a small panic attack every time I think of how we’ll pay for my daughter’s college education or the sting I feel when I realize we’ll most likely never own (or even be able to rent) a house.

I probably would want to tell her about how what seems small or insignificant looks like (and often feels like) failure, but that I’m convinced this is what it looks like to actually follow Jesus around, and that I want my significance to be found in joining God’s work of redemption in the world around me, not in owning more stuff (most of the time), and that I believe in the mission of God enough to hustle and scrap together what it takes to do this and still support my family.

It’s good to know I’m among friends in this journey.

The theme for the upcoming Idea Camp in Las Vegas is sex.

Oh boy.

For many of us in the church, myself included, this is a really tough topic. Talking about it can be awkward, embarrassing, or confusing. Throw on top of that the vast amounts of Christians who struggle with pornography and sexual-based sin, and you’ve got yourself a recipe for sweeping this conversation under the rug as fast as possible.

However, I deeply appreciate the leadership of Charles Lee (founder of the Idea Camp) in being willing to go there because these conversations need to happen. Sex shouldn’t be some shameful thing (no matter how badly our culture has skewed things); in the light of Christ and His redemption, it can and should be a beautiful thing.

Read the rest of this entry »

Eugene Cho, in a recent post, asks the question: Why is being a pastor so unhealthy? He quotes a New York Times article, which says, “Members of the clergy now suffer from obesity, hypertension and depression at rates higher than most Americans. In the last decade, their use of antidepressants has risen, while their life expectancy has fallen. Many would change jobs if they could.”  The picture in his follow-up post, death by ministry, looks even bleaker.

As someone who has been in vocational church ministry for awhile now, I can testify to the unique challenges faced by pastors and church staff.  However, I think it’s also pretty fair to say that almost every job is stressful.  Whether it’s unrealistic expectations, difficult co-workers, or burdensome bosses, most work environments have more than their fair share of pressure.

Read the rest of this entry »