Archives for category: church

Reflections on Asian American (Youth) Ministry: Part Two

March 30, 2007 //

I want to continue to build on some thoughts I began to share here. I will continue to use Marko’s observations on the Asian American (AA) youth ministry as a framework for my response. In my first post, I tried to tackle the idea of youth workers being treated as second (or third) class citizens in Asian American churches. Today, taking on the idea of youth workers being treated as hired guns in AA churches…

68 guns
Certainly, the phrase “hired gun” is loaded (oh, the puns). Though I do have certain critical observations of AA churches in this regard, I do not believe that most AA churches intend for their youth workers to be simply hourly wage-earning automatons — nor do I believe this is what Marko was implying in his original post. Most, if not all, of my peers in AA youth ministry have had a tremendous pastoral heart for their students.

Marko is right in using a somewhat explosive (again with the puns!) phrase in highlighting his underlying point, though. It it vital to recognize that youth ministry is not simply entrusted to AA youth workers, but abdicated to them. This happens for a number of reasons, from my experience.

Perceived inadequacy & professional relevance
First generation (1G) parents often feel inadequate in raising their own children. Beyond the obvious language, cultural and generational differences, many first generation parents simply do not have the time (or, in the worst case, inclination) to sit down and spend time with their children. However, this might also spring from a cultural difference — the idea of Dad tossing around a baseball with the kids on a lazy Saturday might be idealized in the Western perspective, but not necessarily upheld in an Eastern worldview. The 1G love language can be very different, and difficult to understand, for their second generation (2G) children, and vice-versa.

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Categories church, family, ministry, second-generation

detroit, lift up your weary head! (rebuild! restore! reconsider!)

March 17, 2007 //

with a nod to david park over at next gener.asian church and his series of posts on unique korean virtues that em’s aren’t teaching our kids, i will share a couple of things that i love and/or appreciate (though sometimes from a distance) about the korean-american (k/a) church.

like many pastors in the k/a setting, i experience a sort of delirium every weekend. the weekend is, of course, the only time many congregants have available — and so we squeeze every minute out of it with meetings, practices, Bible studies and various other programs (but let me stop before this devolves into some kind of rant about the potential counter-productivity of such an approach).

my weekend begins, as it does in many other k/a churches around the country, with early morning prayer.

there is something strangely romantic about early morning prayer (emp). maybe it’s the idea that we are following jesus’ example in going to a lonely place at the crack of dawn to pray. i’ve heard many people describe emp as the foundation of the k/a church. there really is something amazing about a church that prays so faithfully — gathering in community every morning to seek God.

i must admit, though, that i appreciate the practical reality of emp far less than the concept of it. there are numerous reasons for this: laziness (i think the “loves suffering” gene must have skipped me), my inability to speak korean (it’s hard enough getting there by 5:30 am, let alone sticking with a thirty minute sermon in which i can only glean about ten percent of its meaning), and my growing introvertedness (i had no problem praying myself hoarse in group settings ten years ago, but i’ve changed since then)….

i wonder, though, if my biggest struggle with emp doesn’t come from my westernized perspective. our senior pastor recently asked our second-generation staff about how we, as second-gen people, experience spiritual growth since emp doesn’t seem to be a large part of the equation. while i’m pretty sure this was a not-so-subtle suggestion to start attending emp more than the twice-a-week i’ve been going, this gets at some key issues.

the daily devotion/quiet-time model for spiritual growth is perfectly suited to the highly individualized western mindset. i’ll take my bible and my ipod and spend some quality time with jesus – alone. for many first-gen believers, the value of community is so deeply ingrained that the idea of spiritual growth apart from the community is almost unthinkable. thus, the emp model fits well in the community-minded first-gen perspective.

to be certain, we need balance. spiritual growth requires careful cultivation in both individual and corporate settings. i wonder if there is a way to capture the best of both worlds. it’s sad that, in the past, when i have suggested to second-gen people that we gather for emp (even once a week), they laugh out loud. and then, after realizing that it was not asked sarcastically, they start listing the reasons why they cannot do it.

i don’t think this is an issue of forcing second-gen people to set up more emp meetings. i’m not sure that would be the most effective model for building community and fostering spiritual growth in our churches. but we cannot afford to ignore the values that go into emp: earnest belief in the power of prayer, valuing the community so much that we’re willing to sacrifice for it, making the church community a part of everyday life.

Categories church, prayer, second-generation

leave in silence

March 14, 2007 //

“why should he run the meeting in english?! we all speak korean here! he should speak korean, too!!”

i am a big believer that youth ministry is actually family ministry. there is no way a couple of hours a week at church can shape the heart of a young person. if we’re going to reach students for Christ, then we must reach their families.

and herein lies the dilemma. most of the time, i find myself completely unable to navigate first-generation korean culture. it’s not just that i cannot speak the language (although there has been perhaps a 15% improvement in comprehension over the last couple of years); the cultural gap seems to be growing larger the longer i serve in this context.

last sunday, we had a pta meeting here at church. knowing that very few people look forward to these poorly-attended meetings, the education pastors did our best to keep it short (only about 15 minutes total, between three different ministries — not bad!). we closed in prayer together with the parents and i gathered my things to leave.

it was then, about five or six feet behind me, that i heard one particular dad start ranting, loudly, to a small group of people around him about how unhappy he was. apparently, since i had made all of three announcements in english, he was about to blow a gasket. in the couple of months since we’ve been at this church, i have heard numerous comments from this particular man about how he wants things to be run and the mistakes others have made.

i really wanted to turn around and tell him to calm down. that if i could, of course i would have run my part of the meeting in korean. that there were plenty of other people here who also struggled with english, but seemed to be handling it fine. that, even if i could not communicate well with him, i am reaching his kids. but, of course, since we don’t speak each other’s language (in more ways than one) i chose not to say anything. plus, i was pretty steamed, which is not always the best way to engage a conversation with a church member.

i want to be pastoral with him. his life has been really hard — not only as an immigrant to this country, but with a family life that would make anyone bitter and frustrated. most of the time, this man is very nice, even charming, with church people. but i think he must feel the need to flex on someone. all of his disenfranchisement and disappointment with life come bubbling to the surface, and he lashes out at the youth and education ministries (on whom he must feel like he has the upper hand).

i don’t mean to bad-mouth our church. most of the people here have been very kind, and i certainly don’t expect anyone to cater to my needs. as a pastor, i’m here to serve, after all. however, i am getting worn out by this kind of attitude. it’s not like this church is unique in this. while it might only be a small percentage of people, this type of attitude has been present in almost every ministry in which i’ve served.

grow a thicker skin.
pray more.
forgive.
learn korean.
i know there’s a laundry list of things i can/should do in response to all of this. but it’s still frustrating.

Tags first generation

Categories church, frustration

every little counts

February 26, 2007 //

a quick update about “skits that teach”…

i emailed zondervan, youth specialties and the skit guys toward the end of last week regarding a racially offensive skit that was published in a book called “skits that teach.” my cynical side was fully expecting another “rickshaw rally”-type showdown, but so far, things have been encouraging.

first, i received thoughtful responses from everyone i had contacted. i say thoughtful, because in contrast to lifeway and their stubborn refusal to admit that they had done anything wrong, zondervan, ys, and the skit guys all expressed sincere remorse for what had happened. more importantly, they have agreed to edit future editions of the book to remove the skit and remove current editions from the bookshelves.

i suppose now, all we can do is wait and see how the parties involved follow through on their commitments, but this appears to be a positive start.

david park, over at next gener.asian church, shared some thoughts about asian-americans moving beyond issues that exclusively concern our communities. i certainly agree that our biblical mandate is to speak out for the oppressed, voiceless and marginalized regardless of their race or ethnic background. however, my experience in the asian-american (korean-american, more specifically) church has emphasized personal piety — almost to the exclusion of concern for others. even building houses for families in faraway places serves only as a means to an end — sharing an eternal gospel that has almost no bearing on our present reality, other than to get others to do the same. simply to get as/am believers motivated regarding issues that directly affect us is an enormous task. hopefully, it can serve as a springboard toward a wider, more balanced (and biblical) concern for others.

i think it is a very powerful witness when we are able to advocate for justice for others outside of our community. may God give us His heart and awaken each one of us with care, concern and passion for others around us.

Categories church, hope, race

unbelievable

February 22, 2007 //

actually, i guess i shouldn’t be too surprised at this, but i am still frustrated, angry and disappointed. i found this entry at soong-chan rah’s blog yesterday and it ruined the better part of my day.

An excerpt from Zondervan’s Skits That Teach by Eddie James and Tommy Woodward published in 2006. A skit book meant to be used by youth groups all over the US features the following:

“Herro, Dis is Wok’s Up Restaurant calling to confirm your order. . . . I think that, yes, you total is 14 dollar 95 cent.”

“Herro? This is Wok’s Up Restaurant again. We have drive and drive, and we can’t find you house. We don’t find you house soon, you pu pu get cold. Pu pu good when it hot.”

(Hostile) “Okay, we drive for long time looking for you house. I tell you, you go outside and I look for you. I am driving a red Rincon (Lincoln) Continental. You pu pu still getting cold. Bye!

“Okay, I drive for long time and I stil not find you house. So I am eating you pu pu! Ruckiry it still warm. I was hungry, so I eat it. Mmmmm . . . this pu pu is good. (Smacks lips a few times) You on my bad rist. You don’t call us anymore. Bye!

seriously, give me a break. these “skit guys” are self-proclaimed skit experts and this is the best they could come up with? their “home run” idea to lead off their new book of skits is a played out racist send-up? not only is this kind of “humor” not actually funny – it’s degrading, offensive and lazy. it pains me to think of all the kids who’ve already had a good laugh at our expense.

i’m not much of an activist, but i went into the local family christian bookstore first thing this morning to take a look for myself. sure enough, there was the skit — the first one in the book. i took it to the front and brought it to the manager’s attention. she was also surprised, and immediately took it off the shelf. she said they would pass along the message to corporate. hopefully, they can follow through on this and, just maybe, take this book off all their shelves. a woman who waiting in line behind me overheard what i had brought up, and as i was leaving she actually said, “thank you for saying something about this.” it turns out she is a youth drama ministry leader and has encountered these types of things before. and no, she wasn’t asian.

i am also planning on writing to these skit guys, zondervan and youth specialties to let them know that this kind of thing is not acceptable. i’m sure their responses will be along the lines of the rickshaw rally “we didn’t mean any harm by it” and “you just need to get over it” type of thinking, but i think it’s still important to let them know how ugly and wrong this is. i know they run a business and it’s expensive to remove/re-edit the book, but they are also representatives of Christ — and sometimes doing the right thing costs.

i would love to be able to focus all my time & energy on ministry to people. and i know, of course, that in Christ we are called to be one body — that He destroys all of the ridiculous barriers we set up to divide ourselves. in the end, this skit guys thing isn’t that big of a deal — but there’s no reason for those who create, market and push these products to stop unless someone points out why it’s wrong.

Categories church, frustration, race